not my real name or where I live.

This is not my real name and I don't live in Ireland. This is a public blog and I don't want anyone to know who I am etc. so I always lied on myspace about where I lived too even though I had a private profile over there. Because you never know they could be a stalker. That's the kind of luck I would have is to get a weird stalker.

no cute comments anymore for people:(

One thing I really miss about myspace land is getting cute comments from people and giving them out. I loved to leave everyone a cute weekly comment for their page and now I can't do that on this site:( I really miss my old friends on myspace land too.

8 days since my exodus away from my myspace blog:(

Gee I don't know what to say now I really don't. I feel dirty guilty and depressed. I know I'm goingto hell because I always screw up. I don't know what to do anymore about this serious problem. Maybe tomorrow I'll write in my blog about it. I feel bad I still have to figure out how to suscribe to new blogs on this site. I just gave myself a news feed but I still don't know what that is. I love all these blogs it's so interesting to read other people's thoughts they are all so talented:) Some nice people left me comments and I will return the favor tomorrow after work. I have been working on three different short stories but they need tons of work. I don't know anyone on this site. I sure miss amara and talking to her everyday on myspace land thru blogs and a certain cute chubby teddy bear:(. But I have to protect myself so I don't get hurt ever again or give anyone power over me. The people on this site seem nice so far. It's so confusing though. I'm still trying to figure out what a news feed is etc.

not finished yet. it's inspired by when my neices and nephews moved in with me because there house burned down in detroit.

I am so sad because all my toys are going to heaven. Even my sweet girlfriend Minnie mouse. I know that she was bad sometimes because she would steal my homework sometimes and make my teacher mad at me. Hopefully God never found out about it and she will be able to get into heaven. It all happened so fast. I awoke to the strange smell of smoke and then mommy grabbed me and scooped me up before I could grab her. Mommy was screaming and her tears fell into my eyes as she carried me out they tasted salty. I couldn’t see Minnie mouse through the smoke. I know that he was bad sometimes because he would steal my homework even though the mean teacher never believed me. My brothers and sisters are already huddled outside in a big clump crying for the lives of their toys. There are many fairies outside. I don’t see him outside. I suddenly turned around and an army of flames were quickly engulfing are house. Fire fighters were leaping off a red truck and forcing giant snakes to spray water on the flames. I hope that the snakes won’t eat my pet rat. He is hiding in my pocket shivering. He sleeps with me every night so at least he was with me when mommy dragged me out of the house. I heard that snakes eat rats. That’s why I don’t like these snakes even though they are trying to save our house. The fairies start to flitter around the house and they are using their magical pixie dust to help the firefighters. One of the firefighters is mean because he swats one of them away like it’s only a firefly. I yell at the mean man and tell him to be nice to my little friends but mom just tells me to hush.
I know fires are mean because they eat everything that they touch. I don’t understand how fire can be so greedy don’t they ever get full. I suddenly feel like a bad boyfriend. How could I let my Minnie mouse doll get eaten up by the fire I have to save her. If I don’t I will never get married and I will be a bachelor like my uncle Timmy. Mommy I yell I have to save my girlfriend. You don’t have a girlfriend she shouted your only four years old. Mommy I do its Minnie mouse quick you have to help me save her. Oh for Pete’s sake she screams I’ll buy you another one later now shut your mouth. I start to cry how can mommy be so mean I thought she loved Minnie mouse too she even made a frilly pink ball gown for her to wear on my Birthday.
Daddy is holding my baby brother Sean he is grinning like a Cheshire cat. I never saw him so happy. This is awesome he screeches now we finally can get out of the ghetto and move up in society. I can’t wait to see how big our insurance settlement will be from this. Mommy is still crying and moaning about baby pictures that are being burned up. Oh for Pete’s sake shut up yells daddy After this we will be rich and we can afford to get the kid’s pictures taken a million times.
Suddenly a gang of crypts saunter over to talk to daddy. They are laughing with him and congratulating him on the fire. I always wonder why people call them crypts. I bet the reason they disappear all the time is because they sleep in crypt vaults and the lid accidentally locks them in the coffin and they can’t get out. That’s why I don’t want to be in a gang when I grow up like them. The big fat leader of the gang hands my dad a lighter and suddenly mommy yells at my little sister Angel like she just remembered something horrible. You burned down our house Angel how could you angel just stares at her with a dazed look on her face. She is hiding a green lighter in her hand behind her back. Mommy doesn’t see it. I wonder if angel will burn anything else down. I can’t believe that angel is the one who invited the fire over. I know why she did it too she did it because she is jealous of snoopy because I wouldn’t play Barbie’s with her anymore because Minnie mouse hates Barbie’s. I decide to get back at her. Mommy Angel has a lighter in her hand. Mommy grabs it from Angel. I can’t believe you’re still holding this in your hand after you burned your mattress with it. Weren’t you scared she screams have you no fear? Angel starts to cry and I go over to hug her. I suddenly realize she didn’t do it on purpose because all her Barbie dolls were inside the house. Its okay I mumble. I love you a lot don’t worry all your Barbie dolls will be okay. Is that what happened giggles daddy is that how our house burned down? Because if it is we can sue the mattress company. Those mattresses are supposed to be flame resistant. Yes mommy suddenly cried. I woke up and I ran into her bedroom to find her holding a lighter by her mattress. She had no fear she was just standing there as her bed was burning I picked her up and then screamed for you to wake up. I can’t believe she actually took the lighter outside with us.
The crypts take turns kneeling down in front of angel and giving her the high five sign. She suddenly gives me an impish grin and she is basking in the attention from all her admirers. Daddy picks her up and places her on his shoulders. “You have no idea what you have done for us daddy exclaims. Mommy is still not happy. I just hope that I remembered to send in the insurance check on time she mumbles.
Stubby my pet rat starts to scratch in my pocket. I let him out on the grass because I don’t want him to poop in my pocket. He runs around and the gang people shoot him away like they are scared of him. Yuck it’s a sewer rat one shouts as he aims a gun at him. No he’s a pet rat you leave him alone I shout. They suddenly scurry away in fear as he nips at their shoes. I am glad the crypts are gone they scare me because they always tote baseball bats around with them and guns. They are weird because anytime I ask them to play baseball with me they just laugh and shoo me away. I wonder what they do with their baseball bats maybe they are just stuck up and they only play baseball with adults. I bet I could beat them in a game any day when I grow up I’m going to be a famous baseball player.
I am sad because now I’m very poor. I was rich I had almost the whole block to myself and the fairies. All the other houses were burned down in the dead of the night. Our house was one of the few one’s left standing. I wonder what burned the other houses down. I think it’s the mean dragon that my fairy friends talk about. I wonder why he has burned down all their houses. I always liked him though because the more houses that burned down the more fields of wildflowers that me and the fairies have to play in. sometimes part of the house burned down but not the whole house. These are the best fields to play in because I can go into the house and find lost treasures. I wonder if anyone will ever find lost treasures in our house once we drive away with the firefighters. That’s always what happens to the poor people who get their house burned down. They drive away and never come back. They always look very happy when they drive away. I don’t know why daddy’s eyes are still gleaming and he’s saying we are rich. Doesn’t he know that we almost had the whole block of trees and wildflowers to ourselves now we will be going somewhere I can’t be rich anymore. The fairies all look sad. They don’t want me to go away.
The flames have sizzled away and the snakes are hanging limply in the grass. I scoop up stubby and put him in my pocket. I walk over to a snake and stomp on him with my foot he doesn’t move he must be pretending to sleep. I hope he won’t wake up because stubby will be scared. The house is only halfway burned. I want to run into the house and try to find Minnie mouse but mom won’t let me. Daddy is talking to a police officer who is writing everything down on a pad of paper. Angel looks scared I don’t blame her because she has been a bad girl. The police officer might arrest her for burning down our house. That’s what they always do to people who help the dragons’ burn down houses. They are taken away into a police car and I never see them again. I wonder if that’s what will happen to Angel. The police officer just bends down and pats angel on the head because she is still crying for her barbies. Suddenly a taxi pulls up in our driveway. We all cram in the backseat. Mommy is holding sean in her lap and feeding him out of a bottle. He looks like an angel. I wonder if the angel’s will ever miss him and take him away from us because he’s so cute. Mommy says that all babies come from heaven. I didn’t come from heaven though because in all my baby pictures I looked like a beet red tomato head I wasn’t cute like Sean.
Mommy says that we are going to a hotel to spend the night and then the next day we will be going to live at our uncle Kenneths’ house. His wife is Ann is our aunt and she babysits us all the time. I bet she will be so happy when she see’s us. She will be the luckiest auntie in all the world to have us come and live with her. I know she is sad because she is getting old and still has never had a baby before. I saw a white hair in her head the last time I saw her and when I pointed it out to her she gave me a dirty look and pulled it out with a clipper. I grabbed it from her and taped it to my head so I will grow white hairs on my head. I hope that if I grow enough santa Claus will let me take over his job when he retires. Only I won’t be stupid like Santa Claus because I won’t give any of the toys away for free I will make all the kiddies pay for them. So I will be rich and
My parents are making me share a hotel room with Angel. I hope she doesn’t have a lighter anymore because if our hotel room burns down we will have to sleep in out car. Angel is still wailing for her barbies. Daddy yells for the cabdriver to stop and jumps out of the car. He runs into CVS and comes out with bags of chocolate candy. Here he yells as he hands it to her now shut your mouth. Suddenly angel smiles and munches on the candy. I start eating it too until it starts to melt and turns into a slimy mess. I don’t want to eat anything that looks like it could be rat poop.
I am so happy to be able to stay in a hotel for the night. Because it means I won’t have any chores to do because a maid will do them all for me. That means I can be a little piggy and my parents won’t care. I feel sorry for maids it must be boring to clean after dirty people everyday. I decide that I will leave the maids a nice surprise to cheer them up.
When we get to the hotel room mommy and daddy lock me with Angel in a huge room with two big beds. I jump right unto my bed and hop up and down on it. I try to touch the ceiling with my finger tips. The ceiling looks so plain. Suddenly I have an idea I take out the melted chocolate from the bag and smear the ceiling with it. I decide to draw a picture of Stubby on the ceiling. I bet the maids will be so happy when they see the cute picture I made for them. Suddenly Stubby leaps out of my pocket and hides behind the nightstand. He won’t come out I think it’s his new home for the night.
After I am done drawing stubby I am suddenly tired. I look for Angel and she has collapsed unto the floor in an exhausted state. My eyelids feel like weights. I listen to the sound of stubby snoring and it lures me to sleep. In my dream I find myself searching for fairies in the trailer park where my aunt and uncle live. I find fairies hiding in a pickup truck and one riding on the back of a stray cat.
When I awake the rat picture has dried. It looks exactly like Stubby I decide to leave it on the ceiling so the maid will see it and be happy. Maybe I will become a famous artist because she will tell her boss about me and they will charge more money for people to stay in the special room with the cute picture on the wall.
I notice that Angel is gone mommy must have taken her to her bedroom last night because she wet her bed again. Sure enough when I touch Angel’s bed it is soaking wet. I suddenly promise myself that when I grow up I will never be a maid because it must be the hardest job in the world. I hear a scratching noise in the nightstand drawer. I open it up and there is stubby chewing on a bible. Suddenly I have an idea. I rip the first sheet out of the bible and write the maid a beautiful thank you note on it.
Dear maid, thank you so much for cleaning up my room. My pet rat stubby slept under the nightstand. I think he made a mess back there because it is starting to smell and he also chewed up your bible a little bit. I’m really sorry but I was a good boy. Because I drew a cute rat picture on the ceiling with melted chocolate. I also licked some of the chocolate of the ceiling and it tasted really good. I hope that you and your boss like the rat picture and that everyone will request to stay in this room because of it. If you want me to paint more pictures on the ceiling you can call me should have pictures painted on other ceilings so they won’t look so boring and dreary. Your friend MichealJ
As I leave the hotel with a heavy heart I wonder what adventures await me with my uncle and Aunt. I hope they are nice to me and buy me a lot of toys everyday. I hope that I can find lots of fairies in the trailer park to play with me. The sad thing is that there are hardly any wildflowers in the trailer park I thought that fairies only lived where flowers grow.

fairies disguised as angels snuck up to heaven to be with you.

I saw you as a ghost, my only hope of getting my bestfriend to come back to me.
You looked so much like her down to the little freckles that dot your nose and the long redhair that frames your face. So you became my new best friend. I told you my deepest secrets. I
I even told you that when I first met you in class.
You laughed and told me maybe I was right that you really were her
So I trusted you with me deepest secrets and fears.
You stored them away in your mind and used them to bite me when I told the world what you did to me.
One day I picked up the paper and was haunted by the site of your name on that page.
I ran to where you were killed there was a cross on the side of the road.
Shreds of glass still lingered there like diamonds.

Recently I stopped looking for shreds of glass to bury from where you died.
all I do is remininsce about the past and how I wish you were still
You were supposed to become a famous rock star whatever happened to your dream.
What made you throw it all away to get drunk one night and die.
You used to tell me that you could see fairies.
We used to rescue wild mice and find homes for stray cats.
You said that they inspired your tunes.
I always wondered where your fairy friends went perhaps they disguised themselves as fairies as snuck up to heaven to be with you.

because of a homewrecker:(

Because of you I can’t be happy anymore.

You became my friend just to get with my husband behind my backL
I spent hundreds of dollars on you because you were a welfare mommy and I felt sorry for you.
I watched your daughter and treated her like she was my own even when your other friends just ignored her because they only wanted to party and get drunk.

Now anytime I go to leave a weekly comment on my friend’s pages I see your innocent face and I feel sick because behind that innocent face is someone who betrayed me in the worst possible way.
You have so many friends on your friends list that think I’m a liar because you said lies about me in your blog.
I thought that my husband was safe with you because you told me that you only wanted to help our marriage because he had cheated on me before with all these blondesL
The day before I found those letters I watched your daughter for you and gave her a cute stuffed animal to play with why did you have to do this to me.
What did I ever do to you?
When we went to the bar guys would hit on me all the time but I kept telling them I was married. I tried to hook them up with you instead because I wanted your daughter to have a nice daddy and I wanted you to be happy.
None of the guys would buy you drinks so I bought all of them for you.
I was so happy to find someone who wanted to be my friend and do fun stuff with me besides Carrie all my other friends only called when they wanted something.
I told you my darkest secrets over the phone we talked for hours on end.
You told me that I should dump him because I cold do better but all you did was scheme to get with him behind my back.
He was writing love letters to you when I was still on your friends list.
Yet you never warned me once and told me what he was doing.
You never deleted him from your friend list instead you started leaving him provocative comments like have a happy hump day.
He always deleted the cute comments that I left for him because he said they weren’t manly enough for him but never yours
at first I just thought I was being paranoid but the myspace trash bin doesn’t lie.
Meanwhile I kept leaving cute comments on your page to make you happy and you even put a friendship comment on my page the day I found those letters in his myspace trash bin.
He said he wanted to take you and your daughter on a cruise.
How come he never wants to take me on a cruise?
What do you have that I don’t have?
It must be because you’re a tan blonde and I’m a pale redhead.
I good care of him I never cheated on him I only gave a few men on myspace picture comments to make him jealous but that’s it.
Years ago I loved an awesome redhead who is in heaven now.
We grew up together and I miss this redhead so much but when I started dating Normie I just became friends with that person. I regret that decision every day. If I hadn’t chosen him that person probably would still be alive right now.
I never cheated or lied to him sometimes I dream of fleeing to LA and living like a woman from the L word.
So I’m still not sure for the last three weeks I’ve been tempted to cheat and do what’s been done to me so won’t feel so helpless anymore.
I am still not sure.
For the last three works I’ve been tempted to cheat and do what’s been done to me so I won’t feel so depressed anymore.

The boy who saw fairies:)

There was once a little boy who saw fairies. He saw them peeking out from the bulbs of rose bushes and sneaking out to dance under the weeping willow tree at midnight. The bird bath was home to a whole colony of mermaids that played Marco polo with their water babies. The fairies were funny they often played jokes on his parents and often smuggled him cookies from the pantry and left pretty wildflowers on his bed stand every night. He pointed them out to his parents but they just scoffed and said there was no such things as fairies. He felt sorry for the homeless fairies because they had to live in flower bushes and sometimes when it rained he saw them cowering in the mail box when he went to get the mail.
His grandma could see the fairies and she told him tales of her childhood in Ireland where all the fairies lived. One day the boy saw a white bunny hop through a long spirally hole in the hedge he crawled after it and came into an empty lot with broken bits of furniture and garbage that his parents had thrown away. He had a great idea he would build his friends a new village. He would build them a fairy village where they all could live and be happy. He ran into the house to tell his grandma. She was painting a picture of impish leprechauns with pointed noses sliding down a colorful rainbow. She often painted beautiful fairy pictures for him to hang in his room. She quickly put down her paintbrush and she hobbled outside and entered the world behind the hedge with him. Together they turned the old discarded garbage into a village for the fairies. The broken chair became a castle with never ending winding turrets and a scaly green dragon guarded its entrance. The empty basin became a lagoon for the mermaids to swim in and make musical waves. Broken pieces of wood were nailed together and made into log cabins for the smaller families. Even the white bunny who had led him into the village frolicked and played with the fairies. The fairies often climbed on his back and he took them for long strolls all over the city to find more treasures for their village. His grandma built a campfire and the fairies told them stories about their long journey from Ireland to America on a ship. They said that a little boy had smuggled them into his backpack and that is how they ended up here in his yard.
One day his grandma was missing his parents were frantic with worry they had no idea where she could have wondered off to. The police came hours later bringing her to them she started mumbling in broken sentences and said she didn’t know who these strange people were. Her hair was disheveled and her eyes were stricken with a wild crazed look. The cops just ignored her and left her with the embarrassed family.
As the months rolled by she acted more like a child and the neighbors started to laugh at the crazy old woman who believed in fairies. His parents were worried they decided it was time to talk to the boy. The boy’s father had just gotten an important promotion and they were planning on buying a gorgeous mansion in Grosse Pointe. They were holding an important work party and they didn’t want their new neighbor’s and colleagues looking down at them when they saw this crazy woman mumbling like a child. So they sat him down and explained that grandma had Alzheimer’s and she had to go to a nursing home so trained professionals could take care of her.
The next day grandma was gone and they were moving to their house in Grosse Pointe. It was beautiful with its Victorian era furniture and eight bedrooms. The party was a smashing success and everybody worshipped them for finally achieving the all American dream. The boy didn’t see any fairies in his new house. Before he moved the fairies promised that they would come with him but they were no where to be found. He searched the house form top to bottom. He found hidden passageways and a nest of cute baby birds hiding up in the eaves but still no fairies. He put a flower vase by his bedside to see if the fairies would come and leave him flowers. When he woke up in the morning the vase was still desolate and plain. He asked his parents again if they saw fairies and they told him there was no such thing and that’s when he stopped believing in them.